Turning 30!

Yesterday, I turned 30. I have been struggling coming to terms with the realisation that I am at this stage in my life ALREADY! Inside I still feel and act like I’m 21. I even hate putting my age on the internet and thought about how I could avoid telling everyone! As if turning 30 would somehow repulse people or make me less of a desirable blogger.

The fact that I am getting older and can’t go backwards scares the heck out of me. It feels as though I’m on a strict timeline now and I’m not so happy about that idea at all!

I already have concerns about not being in control of some situations, this is the ultimate situation that I have no control over. I’m not married nor, in a long term relationship, I don’t have a mortgage nor have any children. I have realised though that it is not those things, that define me.

I have loved this past decade. So much of it was spent trying to find myself and with that comes a roller-coaster of emotions. During these past 10 years, I became an adult. I went away to college, worked in many different roles, met lots of different characters, had some breakups and been through many ups and downs but through all of this I have learned more about myself than I could have ever imagined and thanks Mum, I’ve turned into a strong, independent, young woman.

I have dated the wrong guys and figured out exactly the kind of qualities that I want in a partner. I made new friends and lost some old ones.

Sometimes the hardest part of growing up is letting go of relationships, those that perhaps I thought would last forever. 

However, realising that life is all about meaningful connections, knowing this allows me to keep quality over quantity, to put time and effort into those who matter by forming strong bonds with just a few people rather than numerous.

Turning 30 is scary but exciting all the same. I know who I am, I know what I want out of life, well for the most part, but at the moment I am still figuring out how to get there. Nothing happens overnight. Nevertheless, what I have realised is that it’s not about my accomplishments, being married or not having children or knowing my career path which I am still figuring out – it’s about self-realisation and acceptance, being able to say, that I am happy with who I am RIGHT NOW.

Accepting me for me has been one of the hardest journeys of all, although I’m not there yet, I am one heck of a lot closer than I was at 21.

So Instead of self-pity, I am going turn this situation around and remember how far I have come. My 30’s are a time for taking care of myself and being healthy. It’s about enjoying life and appreciating every single moment with the people I love.

And Regardless of how I feel today, I’m thankful for everything I have, now more than ever and I’m sure everything will fall into place the way it’s supposed to and as nervous as I am about entering this next chapter, I truly believe it will be the best yet and I hope you will continue to join with me on this exciting journey ahead x

Rebecca Rose Xx